i think i wrote somewhere else here that a main reason for this blog website thing was for me to practise my writing.. (and american practice).
so far, so good. at least i am writing something. it's helping with my reading too.
i remember the first time i heard the word 'underwhelmed'. i was about 20. maybe i had heard it before, but this time i heard it like it was the first time. in a way it overwhelmed me. like a big wave over me and a strong drag under me. that feeling is similar to how i feel about my reading and writing.
when looking for something.. here, there, thinking, looking.. chaotic, turbulent. then stop, and breathe.. and there it is, in the settled haystack. the not doing led to finding.
centred (and american centered) is often used in a 2D way. of course, even a 1D line can have a centre. whereas middle doesn't really fit a 3D shape. it can but centre is a better fit. for that bit. that point called zero.
shapes are extensions, or drawings, out of zero. there are infinite shapes. i wonder the shape of elementary particles. do they have shape? when an electron is with the nucleus, is it even a particle? and what is half a piece of dust?
it may seem like i am writing for the sake of writing now. like i'm filling in space, and taking up time. an easy blog entry for the day, so i can go and drink a milkshake. and you may be right. i think in the process of writing is where the magic will happen, and nothing else besides writing can produce writing.
thinking, waiting, fasting, ephemeral, impermanent. not that writing is necessarily permanent. there may be a galactic internet you are reading this on. that would be cool. hi! or there may be an end to technology on earth in an ice age, destroying most of the world's writing with it.
is there some sort of groove i need to find?
is declaring cliche the enemy a cliche in itself?
the nothing is the stone drag. the everything the overwhelm.
my blog was always meant to go this way.